Willpower Is Overrated — Friction Is the Real Behavior Changer

Most of us have been programmed to believe change requires willpower.

But willpower isn’t all that useful – for me, it’s only strong in the morning!!

We humans follow the path of least resistance. Whatever is easiest often wins.

The thing is, behavioral scientists know this well, and tech companies weaponized it. They removed every obstacle between us and our next scroll:

• No logout
• No stopping cue
• Instant loading
• Autoplay
• Infinite scroll
• Apps opened in milliseconds

Zero friction.

And guess what? The less friction, the more the habit sticks.

Here’s the empowering flip side:

If friction makes bad habits stronger, friction can also make them weaker.

And this is where you can change everything — without willpower, without “trying harder,” without guilt.

Step 1: Add friction to the habits you want to break.

Examples:

• Put your phone in another room while you work.
• Use Do Not Disturb with exceptions.
• Delete your most addictive app and reinstall only when needed.
• Keep your phone off the nightstand — use a $15 alarm clock instead.
• Log out of apps so opening them takes effort.

Every added step reduces impulsive use.

Step 2: Remove friction from the habits you want to build.

• Keep a gratitude notebook by your bed.
• Put your reading book on your pillow.
• Keep your running shoes by the door.
• Lay out your workout clothes the night before.
• Put fruits or protein snacks at eye level in the fridge.

Make the good things easy.
Make the addictive things inconvenient.

Your brain doesn’t care about “good” or “bad.” It cares about effort.

Real example from my course, Break the Chain:

When your phone sits face-down on your desk, your brain still thinks about it — studies show cognitive capacity drops even when a silent phone is in view.

But when your phone is across the room, you must make a conscious choice to get up and walk toward it.

That small bit of friction creates massive freedom.

The beautiful thing about friction is that it works immediately.
You don’t need motivation. You don’t need discipline. You don’t need willpower!!
You just need obstacles.

This week, add one point of friction between you and your phone. It’s not punishment.
It’s liberation.

And it works faster than you think!

Get more tips and tricks by joining Break the Chain!